Bagel Cut!

Hola--

BAGEL CUT! AAaaahhh!!! I just hate that. I'm cutting a bagle, which of course is "pre-sliced," but not quite enough, right? Being careful as I cut toward my palm, not to get the knife too close. So careful, I am not paying attention to my POINTER FINGER, sticking out randomly, so the knife gets my finger, for Pete's sake. So now I'm trying to finish making lunches and get breakfast together, holding a wet paper towel tight to my finger. (That dumb thing bled for 20 minutes...) Here is an expert opinion on my predicament:

Improper cutting technique has led to many bagel-related lacerations. Mark Smith, head of Department of Emergency Medicine noted, "The bagel is inherently unstable because it's round. In fact there are two unstable surfaces: the knife against the bagel and the bagel against the table...I theorize that it's difficult to modulate the force needed to get through the exterior once you hit the doughy part, and you cut your finger."

(Thank you, Mark Smith of Department of Emergency Medicine.)